Too much butter = self pity

I used to feel glad that the process of making friends at school was behind me. I thought that leaving school would mean only making friends with people I really had a connection with, and avoiding all those acquaintances I didn't really care for. I didn't realise that school friendships are easy because you see each other all the time and you know that arrangement will continue for awhile. I guess I didn't consider how much harder it would be to make friends 'in the real world', or that from now on everyone I meet will probably only have a semi-permanent place in my life. I know that you don't forget your friends, even when they/you aren't together anymore, I just didn't expect people to stop caring so soon.
I think about my friends so often, and people who probably don't think I think about them, and they don't realise how much I love them, because usually the "Oh my god, I just love you so much, I mean, I really LOVE YOU" conversation occurs after several drinks. But I am sincere. I can tell I'm becoming an "old friend" to a lot of people though a.k.a no longer relevant or adored.

*insert self-deprecating comment here*

I have nothing. Except awkward emotionality. I cried in the toilet earlier because my relatives left my brother's birthday dinner without staying to eat the cake that I spent all day baking, layering, smothering in ganache and decorating with violets. I mean, come on.
I blame Christchurch, it makes me volatile. Maybe it's the changing seasons or the northerly winds or something. Yeah, I bet that's it.